Barefoot fairy skanking & ting…


Name that Tune:  “Let the star shine on, to the break of dawn” – Longsight M13, Ian Brown 

 Movie Quote of the Day:     “You’re freaks, all of you! All of you, freaks, mutations!” – The Last Man on Earth 


 MoorFest 2010.  Where do I start?   

I’ll skim over the whole arriving/ e-ticket / paper ticket/ wristband faff.  I’ll gloss over the “Hey let’s stop letting people in because someone pitched a tent in the wrong place” fiasco and me and the kids being on site while Jade had to wait outside farrago. I may not even mention that one of the airbeds had lost a stopper so we had to take turns to sleep on the pumped up bed while one of us had the other one as basically a groundsheet.  I’ll just focus on the fun stuff. 

In festival style I think it best to set the scene and share the lunacy via the medium of photography.   










embarassing mums






Electric Pump Fairy


 Yes.  Creative arts, dancing, wigs, false lashes, wings, wellies, glo-sticks and all manner of culinary delights:-  Tibetan Momo’s, Indian Thali’s, giant samosas and not so luxurious camping staples back at our Living Space of 3 minute noodles, Macca Cheese & burgers. 

It pissed down on Thursday night which meant an early sleeping bag for the childerbeast and Jade & I caning the wine perhaps a tad too enthusiastically, which took a Momo with extra chilli sauce, a Mango smoothie & a bit of a lie down in The Ladybird tent to rectify the next morning. 

 More campers arrived on Friday and the true extent of the botched camping area were revealed in full and glorious technicolor when we were kept awake in the so-called Family Camping Zone by Goldie Looking Chain versus Blazing Squad camped right next to us, having a profanity filled, very loud discussion in the wee small hours of the morning about Ketamine, Methadrone and ‘knobbing birds’. Every 2nd word punctuated by the phrase “alright blood”  “Innit” or “Booooy!” (in a Tim Westwood style).  After 2 nights of it I was within a hair’s breadth on Sunday morning at 5am of getting out of the tent, walking over and shoving his Ketamine and Mmm-Cat up his arse and then sending the childerbeast to play in his tent until he cried or did the honourable thing and either left camp or stabbed himself to death with a tent peg!  

     At 5:30am Sunday morning I was mentally drafting a stern email to the organizers complaining about the fact that they let someone have an impromptu rave right next to the Quiet Camping Zone but then I figured, “well the kids are asleep so what does it matter” & put in my headphones and finally drifted off to sleep to the sounds of Groove Armada & Massive Attack, secure in the knowledge that in a few hours our childerbeast would be awake while Ali G & his posse would be trying to catch some Zzzzs and we could encourage the kids to play the BOGIES shouting game or sing songs about diarrhoea right next to their tent and retribution would be ours! 

 Sunday night we got our own back though as me, Emma and Jade were probably the noisiest ones – having not peaked too soon, we saved our lairy fishwife cackling and giddiness for the last night. Although I am surprised the childerbeast actually got to sleep after we had taken them into the Green Room for a sit down and a lounge and realized after half an hour that we were watching ‘The Last Man on Earth’ on a giant screen accompanied by 2 old dudes on synths playing creepy background music.  Nightmare times! 

 Weatherwise, the situation improved vastly on Saturday and Sunday which were both red hot, which makes all the difference to make an Okay festival a great one.  We did all sorts; the childerbeast made lanterns, dreamcatchers, clay models, puppets, they took part in a Run DMC style dance burn off, the were taught juggling (by me) and flower/devil sticks and plate spinning by the Ladybird Project dudes, and we all participated in the Sunday afternoon Parade.   

    We didn’t see many bands which I think my sister found a bit strange, not being used to such a child-focused festival but I think she enjoyed it anyway. The bands we did see were cool considering we had never heard of any of them and the childerbeast were well behaved and had a great time. 

 We saw some great graffiti artists although my favourite piece of graff was probably this one written on one of the posts holding up the Homespun stage marquee:-  


Quality moments included Emma’s childerbeast chasing a guy dressed as Death across the field and kicking him in the ankles and then running into the meditation yurt screaming “BOGIES!” at the top of their voices and yelling; “Mum, Mum it’s full of people laying down in here, can we go in?” and during the Dance Off when they had a fight during the partner dance round and the judge said; “I’ve not seen a scrap like that since Tim Westwood had a fight in a phone box in Balham with Bobby Davro” – which made me laugh for far too long… 

So that’s my festival experience over for 2010 I reckon.  I think next year I shall start in May and try and get to more than one.  Emma & I are considering either joining forces with an established creative arts project and travelling around with them to these things or setting up on our own.  After being called the ‘’Electric Pump Fairy’ by the 3rd person whose airbed I had offered to inflate with my electric air pump, as I couldn’t bear to see them (or hear them) pumping away on the old squeaky footpump, I may even just hire myself out at £1 an airbed. 

 On the subject of airbeds – guess what my sister found in the corner of the tent when we were packing away on Monday? 

sometimes the smallest thing can make all the dfference


Right, I have to put my wings, wellies, wigs and knee socks away now and tackle the washing. ironing and usual ennui of back to earth domesticity.  Joy! 


Jump around Jump Around


Childerbeast enjoying the music


Lantern Pathway



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