Bum & Bummer


Name that Tune:   “Oh baby dont you know I suffer? Oh baby can you hear me moan? You caught me under false pretences. How long before you let me go?” – Supermassive Black Hole, Muse  

Movie Quote of the Day:     “I hope you’re not using the toilet it’s broken./ Huh? / The toilet doesn’t flush. Dumb & Dumber  

Happy birthday (or Unbirthday) for one of you for D, J & J… and segueing nicely with the Unbirthday thing here are some snapshots of yesterday’s Mad Hatter’s/Marie Curie Tea Party in my backyard. 



Flamingo drawn carriage - the only way to travel

Off with their head!



What is says on the label....

 Kudos to all those who attended and put in brilliant effort with their costumes.  We had 2 Queen of Hearts, a doormouse, a Duchess, a white rabbit, 2 Alice’s, a Cheshire cat, a brace of Mad Hatters and 2 pairs of Tweedle Dee & Tweedle Dums.   

     I think someone was enjoying their thigh length stripey socks a bit too much though.  (Gman, you know who you are!) 


Hello sailor!

 All apologies to Bman who was given short shrift by all for arriving late to his own childerbeast’s party and making minimal effort fancy dress-wise because, as a surprise, he has had my Ellesse watch fixed that I got from my folks for my 21st which has been gathering dust for years in the wardrobe since it stopped working before I even went backpacking in 1997.  Well done that man! 


It's the mercury in the adhesive dontchya know?

 Mid-way through the buns and scones extravaganza (there’s a good word – say it with me…   e x t r a v a g a n z a) I was informed by my cousin that the loo was leaking.  This is never a good thing to hear and particularly not half way through a fundraising tea party, in fancy dress, on a Sunday.  Some mopping, propping of washing bowl to catch drips and a bit of Heath Robinson engineering with a coathanger later and the flooding had ceased but the loo left defunct. 


Plumbers Ed 101


 Bman did his best with it this morning but the general concensus was that “we needed to get a man in”. So I made with the phonecall to our trusty Plumbing Maintenance Cover Provider who decided today, after years of great service, to let us down on a grand scale.   

I called at 2pm… it is now 7pm and unless there is a time zone/worm hole type situation going on today in Walsall where their call centre is based, they are now so far outside their One Hour response time that I could have walked to Walsall by now in order to vent my spleen & smack someone in the face!   

Several telephone calls later and each time having to go through the rigmarole (another brilliant word… r i g m a r o l e ) of giving all my details to a computerized voice and then being transferred to someone who asked me for them all over again.  4 calls in we are now at the stage where we’ve been told to expect the Engineer “anytime before 10pm”.  Awesome!  Bet you $10 he doesn’t turn up and then it will fall to whichever poor bastard answers the phone on the morning shift tomorrow to deal with a very cross & constipated lady! 

 When all else fails though and everything around you is going tits up you can always razz up and down the garden path after dark in your PJ’s on an old tea trolley.  It works for the childerbeast… 


On 2nd thoughts, this is the only way to travel!



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