End of Days

05/06/2010

Name that Tune:     “Now heaven would be a DJ spinning dub all night long and heaven would just kicking back with Jesus packing my bong” – Heaven is a Half Pipe, OPM

Movie Quote of the Day:     “And everyone makes the same pathetic promises” – Election

Good news #1   M-i-L’s apology flowers turned up yesterday so she now has (a) an Olive Tree, (b) a potted Azalea beautifully in flower and (c) a massive bouquet of flowers and most importantly (d) I only spent £23.

Good news #2   I no longer resemble a jaffa-cake-headed Planet of the Apes GaGa clone. The moral of that tale being: – don’t be such a tightwad and get thyself to the Hair Salon & leave it to the professionals rather than ending up spending just as much money yourself on home colourant products. It’s still not my ideal shade but it’ll do for me.  My barnet is now crying out to be left alone other than a weekly deep condition. I shall leave it in peace for the foreseeable.

(I can hear Bman in the bedroom shouting “Primate!” over and over again. He’s either looking in the mirror or playing along with ‘The Weakest Link’. You decide…)

 I will be taking myself off to bed early tonight for the second night running. Am feeling a bit strange today – Neck ache and weird head twinge thing going on. Likely a stroke caused by slow release of hair colouring chemicals into my bloodstream through my scalp. If I don’t wake up in the morning I’d like to apologise for lots of things (too many to list to be honest) and confess to accidentally stealing a rubber doormat from Wilkinsons a couple of years ago when I left it on the hood of the pushchair, paid for my other stuff & then left the store. It was also me (& someone else who shall remain anonymous)who used to sneak into my aunt’s house many years ago via the backdoor and steal biscuits from the basement kitchen cupboard. The same cupboard that she ended up putting a lock on to deter her two sons from eating all the biscuits. I hang my head in shame and owe you around 6 packs of chocolate HobNobs!

Today is polling day so by Friday we may have a new Government.  Hmmm? Interesting times. Hopefully I shall be fully recovered to see how it pans out.

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